P.S. I can't hear my feet
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize
