That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
