worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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