when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
