So drunk, too bad you don't want this
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
