just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
This is my gift to your gina
My day in three words: secret purse cake
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
