I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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