i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
