bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
