gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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