I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
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