I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
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