i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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