She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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