dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize