can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize