i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
