You really coming over, don't trick.
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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