My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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