the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
