Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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