He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
