Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
