I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
