I'm really into asian looking animals
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I just want nice things and good sex
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Randomize
