doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
