YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize