Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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