He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
