We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Randomize
