...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
