So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
