It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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