y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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