***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Randomize
