Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I pour the whiskey from now on
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
