are you still at the devil's house?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
