The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm so fucking centered right now
tonight lets celebrate not being married
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
