white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
