it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
