So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
