Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
