my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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