I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
