I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
