the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize