at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
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