I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
