But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
