Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
